*SUB= Southern UnBelle SB= Southern Belle
Sometimes it seems that my husband needs a good strangling SUB polite warning SB to adjust his attitude. Not often, but occasionally he steps over that "Watch it motherf*cker" line into the "I'm going to strangle you motherf*cker" zone and I have to visibly restrain myself SUB politely remind him SB to take my feelings into consideration.
Take this morning for instance. I'm texting 3 different people trying to line up various things for the kids. After the 4th text to Eric he responds "I'm really busy today." OMG. YOU'RE BUSY? I'M TRYING TO RUN A F*CKING HOUSEHOLD FROM MY DESK WHILE TRYING TO DO MY PAYINGF*CKINGJOB. But please excuse me for taking 30 cumulative seconds of your day.
You know how sometimes you have to punish your children and it hurts you more than it hurts them (not really, but that's what we tell ourselves) but you know it's for their own good? Yeah, I think a good ol' fashioned
SUB Moral of the lesson? We should all strive to better the men in our lives by strangling them just enough to warn them when they're too close to the line, but not enough to leave
SB Moral of the lesson? We should all strive to better our marriages by conveying, gently but firmly, what we need from our husbands.
And that concludes the Thursday SUB lesson.
Happy It's-Almost-Friday, my friends
-Amanda the SUB
Man, I had a comment relating to your actual post, but I was totally distracted by your google ads. They are all for criminal background checks...did you write a post about breaking the law this week?
ReplyDeletePerhaps they picked up on the word strangling in this post, and figured you might need those ads soon?
Holy cr*p, that's too funny! It must be the strangling thing. I keep my illegal activities on the down low. ;-) But you're right, the google ads are distracting. I'm going to get rid of some of the clutter!
ReplyDelete